© 2026 The Couch Critic
Crunch Calhoun, a third-rate motorcycle daredevil and part-time art thief, teams up with his snaky brother to steal one of the most valuable books in the world. But it's not just about the book for Crunch — he's keen to rewrite some chapters of his own past as well.
Asian Hawk leads a mercenary team to recover several lost artifacts from the Old Summer Palace, the bronze heads of the twelve Chinese Zodiac animals which were sacked by the French and British armies from the imperial Summer Palace in Beijing in 1860. Assisted by a Chinese student and a Parisian woman, Hawk stops at nothing to accomplish the mission.
When their plans for a nature trip go awry, Polly and boyfriend Seth decide to check into a motel. On their way, they're carjacked and kidnapped by low-rent crooks Dennis and Lacey, who take the victims and their SUV to a nearby gas station. Along the way, they encounter an increasingly terrifying horde of parasites, and if any of them intend to survive, they'll have to outsmart the deadly organisms.
Following Jigsaw's grisly demise, Detective Mark Hoffman is commended as a hero, but Agent Strahm is suspicious, and delves into Hoffman's past. Meanwhile, another group of people are put through a series of gruesome tests.
A divorced horror novelist coming to terms with the disappearance of his young son inherits an old mansion home to malevolent supernatural residents.
Good-natured astronomer Sam is devastated when the love of his life leaves him for a suave Frenchman. He therefore does what every other normal dumpee would do — go to New York and set up home in the abandoned building opposite his ex-girlfriend's apartment, wait until she decides to leave her current lover, and then win her back.
Three well-off young men—former students at Rome’s prestigious all-boys Catholic high school San Leone Magno—brutally tortured, raped, and murdered two young women in 1975. The event, which came to be known as the Circeo massacre, shocked and captivated the country, exposing the violence and dark underbelly of the upper middle class at a moment when the traditional structures of family and religion were seen as under threat.
An American tourist in Greece finds himself on the run after a tragic accident plunges him into a political conspiracy that makes him a target for assassination.
A well-to-do French family living in Calais deal with a series of setbacks and crises while paying little attention to the grim conditions in the refugee camps within a few miles of their home.
Sue Ellen Crandell is a teenager eagerly awaiting her mother's summer-long absence. While the babysitter looks after her rambunctious younger siblings, Sue Ellen can party and have fun. But then the babysitter abruptly dies, leaving the Crandells short on cash. Sue Ellen finds a sweet job in fashion by lying about her age and experience on her résumé. But, while her siblings run wild, she discovers the downside of adulthood
Desperate to save their marriage, a young couple takes a deal to move into their dream home, but disturbing events reveal the house's troubled history.
A veteran chef faces off against his restaurant group's new CEO, who wants to the establishment to lose a star from its rating in order to bring in a younger chef who specializes in molecular gastronomy.
A group of five mountaineers are hiking and climbing in the Scottish Highlands when they discover a young Serbian girl buried in a small chamber in the wilderness. They become caught up in a terrifying game of cat and mouse with the kidnappers as they try to get the girl to safety.
Held captive in a futuristic smart house, a woman hopes to escape by befriending the A.I. program that controls the house.
Ten years after his original massacre, the invalid Michael Myers awakens on Halloween Eve and returns to Haddonfield to kill his seven-year-old niece.
Jerry Falk, an aspiring writer in New York, falls in love at first sight with a free-spirited young woman named Amanda. He has heard the phrase that life is like "anything else," but soon he finds that life with the unpredictable Amanda isn't like anything else at all.
When their daughter is abducted by experienced kidnappers, the Jennings turn the tables on their seemingly fool-proof plan.
Two hundred years after Lt. Ripley died, a group of scientists clone her, hoping to breed the ultimate weapon. But the new Ripley is full of surprises … as are the new aliens. Ripley must team with a band of smugglers to keep the creatures from reaching Earth.
Driven by an intense need for fame and validation, members of a dysfunctional Hollywood family chase celebrity, one another, and the relentless ghosts of their pasts. Their fragile ecosystem is disrupted by the arrival of Agatha, the scarred and estranged pyromaniac daughter.
Homeless and on the run from a military court martial, a damaged ex-special forces soldier navigating London's criminal underworld seizes an opportunity to assume another man's identity, transforming into an avenging angel in the process.
